Monday, May 15, 2006

On Human Nature

John Derbyshire had a nice write up of the 50th anniversary of the publication of Lolita in today's National Review. Here's a good bit of his conclusion:
Here you see one of the paradoxes of our strange times. Our women dress like sluts; our kids are taught about buggery in elementary school; “wardrobe malfunctions” expose to prime-time TV viewers body parts customarily covered in public since “the lamented end of the Ancient World B.C.” (Humbert); our colleges have coed bathrooms; songs about pimps rise to the top of the pop music charts; yet so far as anything to do with the actual reality of actual human nature is concerned, we are as prim and shockable as a bunch of Quaker schoolmarms. After 40 years of lying to ourselves, we are now terrified of the truth. Which is an unhappy thing, because the truth is bearing down on us fast.
He's right. I've been reflecting on our times, my place in it, and human nature in general. I've been trying to come to some "truths" to help me deal with my own pinging brain. Here are some:

1. I never have to pee more than the 1/2 hour out of every week when the cleaning crew is here to clean the office and shut down the bathroom.

2. For every super hot, super smokin' supermodel-looking chick out there, there's some guy who's tired of sleeping with her.

3. No matter what women say, in the final analysis, they prefer a confident dick who can just get things done to a feeling and caring guy who wants to talk.

4. On ownership: No matter where I sit in my house, I can always see something that needs to be done.

5. The idea of "God" - especially a just God - totally pisses some people off. The twist and contort themselves to remake "God" in their own image. A "God" scares other people. For some "God" makes them real a-holes. Only for a select few does the acceptance of a "God" make for genuinely nice people.

6. Children want to be forgiving. It doesn't take much to be an acceptable parent. Yet I'm surprised at how many come up short. It's so many in fact that I think people must make an active decision to be bad parents and are succeding.

7. People would rather be told what to do and be taken care of than be free to choose their own lives but be responsible for themselves.

8. The easier the honor, the more people will demand to be honored. For example, real soldiers in combat usually don't like to talk about what they did. Especially if they earned anything higher than a purple heart. Also, someone with a Ph.D. in education or "communication" will demand to be called "Dr." while a nobel winning physicist from MIT who perfects cold fusion will be happy being called "Hank" - even if his name is Steve.

9. For pretty girls, it's healthy to have a flaw. A crooked nose, fat thighs, big ears. Something...anything. Something to humble them. Something to remind them that they are human. The most obnoxious women are the flawless beauties. The ones who no guy ever told to shut up because they were just too damn good looking. Maybe this applies to guys to. I don't know since I'm not a homo.

10. Once past a cetain point - say 20 minutes - the longer a woman spends getting ready to leave the house the more unattractive she will be.

11. No restaurant needs a tv displays...yet it seems that they all do.

12. Most people make decisions based on what others will think rather than what they want...including me. Sad. Very Sad. This makes people very easy to manipulate.

13. Nothing satisfies the human spirit like doing something of value.

14. Men leave their wives and children. Women may leave their husband but almost never their children. That says why Mother's Day is more important than Father's Day.

15. Guys. Things I can't imagine any woman wanting to see a man in: 1. a ball cap 75% of your waking hours. 2. dockers and a golf shirt - always. Office workers: mix it up a bit.

Stay You.
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